At this time of year, people often make promises to themselves - resolutions that can prove as fleeting as Victor Meldrew’s exuberance. Ambitious vows such as, 'I'll drop five stone before beach season so I can wear my new Speedos,' tend to melt away the moment the fridge door swings open and our favourite meal beckons. A few months later, perhaps another three stone heavier, our attempts at self-hypnosis - meant to dull the sting of ridicule we feel when squeezing into that long-anticipated outfit in July - quickly erase any trace of a smile. Naturally, having to admit our failings the moment we unpack our suitcase at the hotel is not quite how we pictured our holidays on 1st January. Yet this is not the worst of our self-deception. The real issue is that we persist in convincing ourselves, despite those bulges around our waists, that it is not so bad. Really? How can that protruding paunch possibly be 'not that bad'? How have we become so absurd as to regard the barrel we lug around our upper bodies - the one we use to rest the drinks tray on - as some sort of badge of beauty? Human nature - mine included of course - never ceases to amaze me.
Nevertheless, as I am prone to making resolutions myself, this 1st of January is no exception. Although, realistically, I am not quite sure what I should pledge - apart from my plans to sit the CPE exam. I could delude myself with the same target - fitting into my Speedos this year - but as summers are statistically getting warmer and our enthusiasm for going to the beach is approaching zero, I cannot see why I would need to wear them. Besides, the office would hardly allow me to traipse about in them. In any case, I really ought to do something about my weight; at nearly 18 stone and around 6 foot 2, it is high time I addressed it. I’ve just checked online and, according to the latest health guidelines, my BMI ought to be around 24 rather than 32 - a significant gap to overcome. Well, it seems I’ve just found my resolution and set myself a new goal for the year.
Let’s see what July brings, shall we?
Happy 2026
Nevertheless, as I am prone to making resolutions myself, this 1st of January is no exception. Although, realistically, I am not quite sure what I should pledge - apart from my plans to sit the CPE exam. I could delude myself with the same target - fitting into my Speedos this year - but as summers are statistically getting warmer and our enthusiasm for going to the beach is approaching zero, I cannot see why I would need to wear them. Besides, the office would hardly allow me to traipse about in them. In any case, I really ought to do something about my weight; at nearly 18 stone and around 6 foot 2, it is high time I addressed it. I’ve just checked online and, according to the latest health guidelines, my BMI ought to be around 24 rather than 32 - a significant gap to overcome. Well, it seems I’ve just found my resolution and set myself a new goal for the year.
Let’s see what July brings, shall we?
Happy 2026
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